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Thursday, 22 December 2016

When sexist casteism the ‘lessons’ to be ‘learnt’ from the brutal murder of S Swathi


Brutal murder of S Swathi

This is what's wrong with the manner folks think!


When somebody cites the instance of a brutal murder to provide casteism and marital lessons, it'd be honest to mention that we have a tendency to – as a society, and as girls – ar in extremely massive hassle. In what will be solely be taken as Associate in Nursing example of hard-core patriarchal  mental attitude, the founding father of a Chennai-based marital web site wrote a protracted diary on the “Lessons From the Tragic Episode of Swathi”, within which the primary and foremost takeaway/lesson was “Boys from alternative caste ar keen to bracket ladies of upper Genetics”.

N Panchapakesan, founder, city Sai Sankara Matrimonials, recently authored a diary on his web site giving condolensces “to the good, Young, Cheerful, package woman, hailing from a decent and cultivated Family” S Swathi, the Infosys tekki UN agency was dead, reportedly by a person she met through a social media web site. Though, Panchapakesan’s issues concerning the ordeal of girls, impact of media on society, safety perils of social media and therefore the “diminishing worth system for Morality & Conscience” ar all legit, one can’t facilitate however gawk at his reasoning whereas explicating the connection between giving in to temptations (by largely ladies, tho' there has been a strained try at reprehension the boys too), the rarity of being born as Brahmins and “running our wedding Bureau solely for Brahmins”.

The “Himalayan Blunder” of it all! (His words, however again!)

The audacious diary post has since been taken down, however the actual fact that it had been written all over again showcases the blatant, unapologetic, condescendingly patriarchal  thought method that exists in our society. And these ar the people that ar concerned in matchmaking! whereas sympathising with the plight of recent girls, he will appear to ‘understand’ that “Moving with persons of woman folk has become inevitable for ladies attributable to educational activity & Career Needs”, on the other hand comes the clincher – “Hence it's necessary that ladies should follow the fragile art of keeping individuals at a distance and moving friendly yet with utmost restraint.” I’m virtually tempted to recommend this ‘delicate art’ be enclosed as a course somewhere!

Apparently, of late, he’s found “Girls have gotten spoiled quite the Boys”. Why aren’t we have a tendency to surprised?! that is perhaps why, he thought it uncumbent on himself to urge others to implement “lessons expressed by Sri K.G. Sivakumar Inspector of Police”, that embody being careful whereas acceptive Facebook friend requests, not trusting anyone as a result of they’re professionally qualified, not falling crazy suddenly (there goes all probabilities of affection initially sight!) or maybe not being “vigorous in posting your views in teams that ar fairly often amusing in unwanted chats in any social media”, as a result of – let’s face it – girls ought to in all probability not be posting or expressing any views at all!

But Mr Panchapakesan’s pearls of knowledge don’t finish there. He goes on to mention that “To change state as a person's being may be a rarity ! to require a Birth as Brahmin remains a lot of a rarity !” and that’s wherever his web site comes in. After all, Nazi talked against dilution of races through matrimony, too, right!

Sure, this diary has been taken down currently. which fits to point out a minimum of somebody thought it had been inappropriate; however – once more – why was it written within the initial place? If the author was at first attempting to create sense of the planet, so are we.

Why did Salman Khan suppose it had been okay to ever compare extreme exhaustion to being such as feeling sort of a “raped woman” – even in his head, plus speak it out loud?

Why will a feminist e-zine feel the necessity to vary editorial policy to create certain solely girls write on girls, Dalits write on Dalits so get lambasted for ‘compartmentalising’?

Why will Associate in Nursing Olympics-level jock even need to hear the words “You’re too pretty to wrestle” once, plus cardinal times that she’s tired of it?

Why ar girls goddam for obtaining raped?

Why is there a gender-based wage gap?

Why will we have a decide UN agency asks a rape victim: “Why couldn’t you retain your knees together?”

Why will we would like a Tanmay Bhat to say… ‘dude, gender equality suggests that feminism’?

And why will gender equality got to mean feminism?

No, apologising later doesn't create things higher. Saying ‘Oh, I ought ton’t have aforesaid that’ doesn’t modification the very fact that it should ne'er are thought of in any respect. And deleting a diary doesn’t create it non-existent.

Yes, if we have a tendency to board times once “motherf****r” and “behen***d” ar acceptable expletives by all (including women), and somebody is comfy citing the instance of a brutal murder to provide casteism and marital lessons, we have a tendency to – as a society, and as ‘humans’ – ar in a very definite region.

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